Reasons why lifting weights sucks… or perhaps not

1.  It becomes a lifestyle

When you first start out you dread going because those big guys in the gym look at you like you are fresh meat at the state pen. You don’t know whether you are going to get laughed at or assaulted at the power rack, so you gravitate to the circuit training area thinking “hey at least the soccer moms won’t laugh at me”. Meanwhile those chicks are all staring at the guys in the free weight area and you have a revelation.

You start getting the courage to go over, lift real weight, learn form, eat like you want to grow and rapidly it becomes a new lifestyle rather than a chore.

Your friends want to stay out late on Friday night drinking Jager bombs while you swallow club soda. You leave early because its squat day with the guys at 9AM on Saturday and you learned the hard way in the beginning that squatting with a Jager induced hangover sucks life.

Instead of scarfing back fries and late night shit food, you are drinking protein shakes and managing your macros correctly.

You slowly begin to dissipate from the people who don’t support your goals and hang out with the ones who make this a lifestyle.

Forget weekend binging and drinking until 4AM, you have adopted a new, boring lifestyle.

Hey, maybe you aren’t as exciting as someone standing on the bar yelling “SHOTS ON ME!” but you have more free time to actually enjoy the stuff around you that doesn’t have a door covered in neon open signs.

2.  You get stronger so people want you to help

Now you are the go-to guy to help friends move, open jars, push cars that are broken down and everything that comes along with it.

Yea that does actually suck a little bit, but think of the real friendships you are making by helping out people with your newfound strength. Nobody is going to call the 140 pound runt, they are calling the 230 pound beast with a 500 pound squat to help move the fridge.

Moving shit like that with your buddies is quality time, hard work forges friendships. Value it.

3.  You get in better shape, attracting envy and jealousy

Guys are competitive as hell. Every jackass wants to be an alpha male even if they have to fake it. It doesn’t matter if you are one or not, nobody really cares…. but on the rare occasion you may go out and hit the bars on the weekend you can bet your ass dudes are going to be eyeballing you thinking “I can take this pussy down”. Meanwhile that beer swilling sack of shit is on his 12th Coors Light (lower calories so he feels better) and a few shots of some fruity crap he got from the shot girl in an attempt to get her number.

One of those morons may slam into you by “accident” hoping to prove his balls actually dropped, but chances are you are confident enough in yourself where you just shrug it off as some douchebag trying to be a tough guy.

After all bar fights end in three ways… you either get kicked out of the bar, hurt or in jail… sometimes all three. Jail time means you miss the 9AM squat session… that sucks.

4.  You no longer have boxed food all over your kitchen

Packaged food is high in sodium, carbs and all sorts of fun chemicals that will make your corpse look like a medical experiment gone bad. Now you have to waste time making real food; meat, fish, chicken, veggies, etc.

Instead of having a dinner ready in 5 minutes at the touch of a button, it takes 20-30. Maybe you will actually start to enjoy real food, get those dormant chemically destroyed taste buds back, stop having a taste for MSG and refined sugars and feel better.

Eating out is a minor hassle, you could be an anal-retentive prick and make the kitchen want to spit every snot soaked spitball into your food or you can just suck it up for a cheat meal. You eat well enough already where one cheat meal isn’t going to destroy you… if you feel like one meal will, you are either in pre-contest mode or a raging idiot.

5.  You have to buy new clothes

Buying pants and dress shirts are annoying. As you grow into a Minotaur you see that you can’t just go into the local store and get pants off the rack anymore. They are too loose in the waist while the legs and ass feel like yoga pants buckled with a straight-jacket.

Buying decent pants becomes a chore. This is when you have to suck it up and get a couple pair of good jeans that cost a little more than 19.99. But they will last longer, fit great and look a hell of a lot better on you than some off the rack redneck jeans from Wal-Mart.

Shirts become fitted shirts, you look better in them. No more baggy, loose fitting shirts that make you look like a reject from a bad hip-hip video. You look like a man. Be happy with that, throw out those “this guy needs a beer” shirts and load up on some classic designs like plain black v-necks that never go out of style.

Your social life will thank you.

6.  People ask “how much ya bench”

As annoying as that question is to hear, and yes you WILL hear it a lot… answer it.

Every person out there has a little kid in them that looks up to people that lift weights. Its like the Hulk syndrome. Everyone wants to be that, but few want to work for it.

Be cool about it, don’t be a narcissistic ass and showoff, but be proud of yourself.

Its going to be a question you are going to hear for a very long time…


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5 thoughts on “Reasons why lifting weights sucks… or perhaps not

  1. No one wants to talk to the guy drinking club soda at a party though. You are lame. When all you do is post stuff about how people eat bad food and you are so much greater than them you become the biggest douche. No one cares you can lift a substantial amount of weight. WoopDeeDoo. You miss out on some of the fun times in life because “I gotta get up early to lift wights”. Im sorry but all big time weight lifters and people that preach health and cut down all bad food all the time are the biggest tools in life.

    1. Thanks Chris for your input, I think you are a bigger douche for assuming that I preach health all the time or walk around and act like I am telling everyone how much better I am than them.

      If your fun times involve hangovers, shots and staying awake until 3AM drinking; you can keep it. There is more to life than bars, tailgate parties and drinking.

      Balance is attainable without sacrificing what you work hard for.

      So, if someone is going to look at me weird for drinking a club soda at a party and think I am lame; I think they are lame for feeling the need to get drunk to have a good time.

      If you think I am a tool, good, that means I have one less asshole asking me if I want a drink and trying to pressure me into it.


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